The Family Plan 2 is rated PG-13 by the MPA for sequences of violence and action, sexual material, and some strong language.
Ever wondered what it feels like to watch a movie evaporate in real time like you’re staring at it, but it’s already fading from your brain while it’s still playing? That’s pretty much the entire “The Family Plan 2” experience. It’s the cinematic equivalent of reaching for a snack bag and finding there’s nothing inside but air. Technically a movie exists here, but calling it filmmaking feels generous.
When the original “The Family Plan” dropped on Apple TV+ in December 2023, it became the streamer’s most-watched movie an impressive milestone for what was, honestly, a painfully bland action-comedy. That record was later broken by “Wolfs,” another monument to mediocrity, proving only that streaming numbers and actual quality parted ways a long time ago. But somehow, the success of that first, aggressively forgettable film delivered us a sequel that’s even worse. “The Family Plan 2” is a sluggish parade of clichés, cardboard action scenes, and jokes so unfunny they practically apologize as they land.
Director Simon Cellan Jones returns, as does Mark Wahlberg, who continues his run of playing vaguely dad-shaped action characters with all the enthusiasm of someone reading a warranty manual. Wahlberg’s Dan Morgan formerly a Buffalo car salesman with a secret assassin past no longer has the advantage of mystery. The whole “ordinary dad is actually a deadly killer” thing gave the first movie at least a premise, even if it was borrowed from “Nobody,” “Taken,” “True Lies,” and basically every Gen-X dad’s favorite action flick. Here? That angle is long dead, and nothing of substance rose to replace it.
Everyone now knows Dan used to murder people for a living including his kids and the biggest conflict in his life is that his daughter Nina is overseas studying while his son Kyle would rather play video games than engage in forced family bonding. Dan just wants the whole crew together for the holidays. Heartwarming idea, sure, but in execution it’s about as lively as cold mashed potatoes.
The movie kicks into “action” gear when Dan is contacted by a London bank to test their security systems. Naturally, this spirals into a ludicrous continental chase involving Dan’s estranged half-brother Aidan, played by Kit Harington the only actor here who even pretends to care. Aidan manipulates Dan into breaking into the bank, snatching something that unlocks their late father’s assassin network and a pile of hidden wealth. Then he frames Dan and his family for the robbery, kicking off a Europe-hopping chase so generic it feels like it was assembled solely from stock footage and travel-agency brochures.
Dan, Jessica (Michelle Monaghan, tragically wasted), their kids, and Nina’s conveniently parkour-obsessed boyfriend Omar zip through London and Paris. Omar’s parkour isn’t a character trait; it’s basically a plot coupon, redeemable for exactly one rooftop chase scene that asks us to believe Mark Wahlberg a man firmly in his fifties is leaping across buildings like a budget Spider-Man. It’s not convincing. It’s not even amusing. It’s just there, because the script needed something to happen.
And speaking of action: the choreography is approaching late-stage Liam Neeson territory stiff, chopped to pieces in editing, and clearly designed to hide the fact that no one on screen is capable of the moves the plot wants them to pull off. When the action fails, the film tries to lean on comedy, but everything falls squarely into the realm of “protective dad jokes” written by someone who has never met an actual teenager. Even Europe gets treated like a punchline; the film tosses in the most predictable needle drops (“Tubthumping” in a pub truly groundbreaking) and hits tourist spots with all the nuance of an Epcot pavilion.
Wahlberg looks exhausted by the material. The kids are reduced to one-note caricatures. Michelle Monaghan might as well be a stand-in, and you half expect Ethan Hunt to rappel down and free her from this cinematic hostage situation. Kit Harington, admittedly, brings a spark not enough to save the movie, but enough to highlight how lifeless Wahlberg feels in contrast. At least someone showed up to work.
The script’s laziness becomes almost funny unintentionally. There’s a moment when Dan tells his family that their code word for the mission is “abort.” That’s… not a code word, Dan. That’s just a command. Shortly after, Dan is ambushed on a rooftop by an assassin who gets the drop on him. Gun to the head. Tension building? Nope. Cut away, gunshot sound, cut back bad guy dead, Dan barely breaking a sweat. It’s like he teleports through the fight. The movie isn’t choreographed or plotted so much as loosely sketched out with arrows that say “stuff happens here.”
Content Breakdown for Parents
Violence & Intensity: Moderate: Frequent action scenes: fistfights, chases, rooftop pursuits, and gun threats.Violence is stylized and mostly bloodless — think TV-friendly spy antics rather than gritty combat.Tone aims for comedic danger, though younger or sensitive kids may find the guns and constant peril stressful.A few scenes imply characters are in life-or-death situations, but nothing graphic is shown.One moment where a character is suddenly shot offscreen may be surprising for some kids.
Language: Mild to Moderate: Occasional mild swear words (e.g., “hell,” “damn”).A few PG-13-level insults during stressful moments.No slurs or heavy profanity.
Sexual Content / Nudity: Very Low: No nudity, No sex scenes.A teen/young-adult couple appears, but their dynamic is kept sweet and PG.One or two lines hint at romance, but the film stays firmly in family territory.
Drugs, Alcohol & Smoking: Low to Moderate: A pub scene includes adults drinking beer.A few background shots involve alcohol (wine glasses, bar settings).No abusive drinking, drugs, or smoking shown.
Parental Concerns
The action is constant, and while not graphic, it’s relentless.
Some scenes rely on guns pointed at characters, which may bother younger viewers.
A few jokes fall into the cringe “overprotective dad” category.
The storytelling can be chaotic younger kids could have trouble following the plot.
There’s nothing deeply objectionable, but the tone sometimes skews more intense than expected for a “family action comedy.”
Matthew Creith is a movie and TV critic based in Denver, Colorado. He’s a member of the Critics Choice Association and GALECA: The Society of LGBTQ Entertainment Critics. He can be found on Twitter: @matthew_creith or Instagram: matineewithmatt. He graduated with a BA in Media, Theory and Criticism from California State University, Northridge. Since then, he’s covered a wide range of movies and TV shows, as well as film festivals like SXSW and TIFF.